Friday, May 30, 2014

India. Dangers of stereotyping.

For the longest time I considered myself particularly neutral in my reaction to situations, news articles et all. However being a law student who prides herself on being a firm believer in the right of free speech and generally the right of equality, I go through periods when certain news items bring me to a boiling point of angry emotions. The only way I can then deal with my conflicted and disturbed heart is take it out in the form of a piece of writing. Before I formally talk about what I recently read that forms the rough subject of my post- I thought giving a brief background is only fair to enable my readers to understand my point of view better.
I am and Indian girl, very, very proud of my ethnicity and proudly wear it on me even when I get out of the country. I feel like people who are naturally inclined to judge/ hate will do so irrespective of my efforts to hide myself (read: when in Rome, do as romans do- never really believed in this saying) and act like something I’m not- change the way I talk, dress to “fit in”, be understood etc. Isn’t it more normal the idea- that as humans beings we are not meant to fit in- we are all incredibly different- the world is not a puzzle its more practically a maze- exciting, unexplored and unique- the idea of fitting in therefore has never appealed to me. For one semester in college, I had a marketing teacher- the coolest teacher I ever got to learn from incidentally and she used to say this one thing- how consciously or unconsciously we are ALL just selling ourselves daily to the world and if we were more aware of this fact we would sell ourselves more authentically. I never quite contemplated her words but now more so than ever believe in selling the most authentic, real, not forced version of myself to the world- ethnic clothes, jewellery et all.
Last year, I got a chance to go on an exchange programme to the US through my college for a short one month summer school course- I took an additional 2 weeks after my course ended- to travel around- visit a college senior in NYC- meet an old school friend in Miami etc. And through it all, I told myself that there was no way in hell I’m going to hide who I am- wore my bindis, nose ring- passed down through family- its party of my cultural tradition- and make it look COOL. As an aside, India as a country is made up of a mosaic of many different states with different languages, cultural diktats etc. – I’m a Kumaoni from a state in the North of my country, speaking a language totally different from my school friend who hails from a western state speaking the language Gujarati. Anyway, I realised that initially the looks I got in subways, cafes etc. unnerved me but later ,when people actually noticed me positively- an African American stunning and incredibly stylish girl actually complimented me on my unusual and attractive fusion of east and west- bindis, nose ring, black sports, shoes, shorts and hair tied in a bun with an Ikat print scarf (Ikat is a print from the Indian state of Gujarat also practised as a textile art in some South American countries. ) was when I realized how even the smallest of actions can make huge impacts in the long run. Perhaps if I had let my self consciousness compel me to blend in by wearing the usual New Yorker unform of bland and boring (in my opinion) black I would have not experienced this surge of pleasure on being considered different and unique- since when does differant equal outcasted or unattractive.
On the other hand, during my month long summer school course in my interactions with the other students, I didn’t play down the fact that I’ve grown up watching American TV shows, movies, idolised stars, listened to rock AND pop music and have a pretty substantial AND embarrassing knowledge of American Pop culture- like who Demi Moore is dating right now, the first movie Lindsay Lohan starred in. I watch my own movies and criticize campy and sappy romantic movies- both Hollywood and Bollywood too by the way. The point essentially is I was trying as hard as I could to be MYSELF. As a country I feel India is a hard sell- yes there’s garbage, repulsive and depressing poverty, bigoted attitudes but then there are all kinds of people too, people like me who grew up with immensely chilled out and progressive thinking parents and on the other end of the spectrum parents in the country who still believe their daughters should get married before they turn 25! Some of these girls are girls I went to school with and I JUST DONT GET IT! Not that there is anything wrong with early marriage- they weren’t forced- they just sort of went with the norm and now post happily married pictures on facebook with their hubbies- I’m gagging while writing hubbies- I still feel like a kid and then there are girls who tag their HUBBIES in pics in honeymoon pictures on beaches snuggling etc. The overflow of PDA aside, its just surreal to be married before you’ve even started a job or looked around at what the world has to offer- men and the rest.
My point through this angry and possibly incoherent rambling is its hard to figure out things when you close yourself to the alternative- basically stereotypes are dangerous and destructive- just as people and personalities are complex so are countries and cultures- and the more you believe in the obvious – due to lack of exposure, the image sold by television shows etc (One of the many reasons- I DO NOT WATCH shows like Outsourced or The big bang theory- the nerdy brown kid token actor thing is so overwritten- People need to open their eyes a little bit and if they HAVE to stereotype- find some new and original stereotypes) the more these opinions are voiced and then the more they;ll multiply. I know it seems like a small thing- I could say- how can my opinion of Americans for instance- as obese, culturally challenged etc people really make a difference (BTW I have no such opinion- my closest friend currently is an American girl who came for a short exchange programme to my college and she pretty much overshadows us all in her knowledge of obscure art forms, music, theatre etc. ) but the point is as human beings we don’t live our lives in isolation-we spread consciously or unconsciously our thoughts and views.
This is a topic which I can talk on for hours and probably needs a more lengthy blog post to truly and effectively cover but for now- I think its best that I get to the subject of my post which is this weird trend of human dolls- or specifically human barbie- I saw this article while browsing through E-online and was struck with horror and disgust at both this bizarre trend if it can be called that and the views such people are perpetuating and getting mileage and their 15 minutes of fame at the same time- I have attached the link for anyone who wishes to understand my frustration better- she basically talks about her distaste of children- that is OK- i cant stand kids either and don’t really know how to communicate with them- a standing joke at my house is how when Shriya enters a room filled with babies they all start bawling or hide their faces- Whatever- however she expresses her disgust in quite a how should I put hateful manner- Anyways she goes on to discuss her disgust for mixed race marriages and how they spoil beauty standards etc. Read the entire article to possibly feel just as bewildered and disappointed as I did- disappointed in the kind of people that still exist in today’s age of massive internet exposure and travel and all that.
My personal opinion- Mixed race marriages are beautiful- the kids produced are special- with one of each kind of looks and personalities. My aunt is married to an American and settled in Australia- her kids have golden hair, lightly brown skin, almond eyes and beautiful pink mouths- i apologize for this sappy description- point is they are striking to look at- the mixture of looks makes them stand out- i honestly can get over how insanely attractive and appealing to the eye they’ll grow up to be. – A career in modelling perhaps. The obvious beauty thing aside, they know about Indian culture, can speak Hindi but also love Ameircan sports and food. I mean c’mon that IS soo cool! I wish I was a mixed race kid. By giving a voice to people like this weird-ass human barbie- the media or whoever is just spreading this infectious idea of  hatred- its mind boggling how it even stands- people travel now- a Lupita N’yongo is considered universally gorgeous- i think her skin literally lights up from inside. I can cover everything I’d like to about my issues with her post- I’d just like to say to whoever reads this to think in their head while they read my post or her insensitive article-
WE ARE BETTER THAN THIS.
I too wish to strive to be more tolerant, more open and more accepting.

P.S.- nothing against plastic surgery- all for people’s right to chose as long as they are NOT hurting others in the process
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http://www.eonline.com/news/529091/human-barbie-tells-gq-she-s-repulsed-by-kids-says-mixed-races-have-ruined-beauty-standards

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